Three more cheeky drabbles today that may be the start of a new ongoing series. Enjoy.

Onboarding
A knock sounded on my door.
“Come in.”
A jittery man stepped into my office. “Um, the lady at the front desk sent me here”
“You must be the new convert. Please have a seat.” I waved a hand at the chair, smiling as he sat down. “Welcome to Vampire Resources Onboarding. I have a couple of preliminary questions and then we can get you registered.”
“Registered? I’m confused.”
“Your sire didn’t explain things, did he? Are you an unwilling convert?”
“Unwilling? No. I mean, I wanted to become a vampire.”
“Oh, good. Far less paperwork if there was consent.”
The Preliminaries
“There are three principal forms to fill out or sign. A basic information form, a services form, and the legal agreement and liability statement that you need to sign,.” I shuffled some papers, handing him the necessary paperwork. “Now, who sired you?”
“Um, Richard Whitington.”
“Well, him again. He’s been active lately.” I repressed a sigh. “What is your current employment?”
“I work the night shift at a convenience store.”
“Excellent. Job relocation should not be required. One last thing and I’ll walk you through the forms. Do you agree to abide by the laws of the vampire community?”
“Um…”
Oh, The Paperwork
“And finally, unsanctioned blood feuds are prohibited. To consent to these terms, understanding any violations may result in assassination, please sign and initial the last page.”
With a scratched signature, we moved on.
“Wonderful. Now for form one, we need things like name, age at time of conversion, home address, etc. Gender and sexual orientation are optional, but it does help with invitations to the vampire single mixers. Many of our members are fluid in their preferences.”
“Okay. And form two?”
“What services you’ll require. Blood delivery, body disposal, and convert onboarding are standard, but we do offer other perks.”

They are interesting.
LikeLiked by 2 people