Frankie and Joni are back for three more drabble adventures with Corporate. Enjoy.
Has Corporate Lost Its Mind?
“Have they been drinking?” Frankie mumbled.
“What? Did the animals get into my stash again?”
“No, it’s this new list of pitches from Corporate. They had to be drunk when they wrote these. They are…absurd.”
“Corporate’s ideas are too absurd for you? I have to hear them.”
“Well,” Frankie gave me a side-eye. “Here are a few of them. Three ducks waving flags. Psychedelic mangoes. Sea turtles, but made of cheesecake.”
“What? That’s nonsense. Where’s the show idea?”
“There are no show ideas. Only one line pitches. Here’s the worst one. Giralion yoga.”
“Giralion yoga? What is that?”
“No idea.”
More Pitches
“Well, I found out what a giralion is. It’s stranger than I thought.”
“Huh? Oh that weird pitch.”
“Yeah. It is a giraffe/lion hybrid.”
I tried to envision that and failed in the attempt. “Did they do any follow-up on those bizarre ideas?”
“No, but they sent more. Things like: salty Santa, big ants in floral bonnets, a hippopotamus on a sinking yacht, a mechanical, steampunk Icarus…” He hesitated. “Hmmm, that one has potential.” He typed something into his tablet. “But the rest of these… Oh, wow. Listen to this one. A clown in a top hat juggling hams.”
Hallucinations
“Hurrah! No more awful pitches. It was a programming glitch.”
“Good. The latest batch listed melting ice buckets and cheesy shoe buckles. What happened?”
“Some new program they tested. It accessed an old database and spewed out stored prompts from the antiquated times, sending them off as vid pitches. Random strings of hallucinated nonsense transmitted to everyone in the company.”
“Everyone?”
“Yeah. Corporate was panicking for four days straight until they deleted the old data and shut down the program. They rebooted whole system sections.”
“Too bad, I was looking forward to those psychedelic mangoes.”
Frankie stuck out his tongue.
Be Afraid of the Dark 
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